Don’t Get Seduced by the Dark Side

First of all, I have neglected posting anything for several weeks and I can tell…mentally. Back to my weekly rants and visions. My weekly reminder to myself to laugh as much as possible and cry at least once, everyday.

I recently was reminded of the power of positivity…and the power of negativity. I look at this like the force from Star Wars. Use the force, but beware of the power of the dark side.

I was able to travel back to my home state of Michigan for a few days. My older brother was visiting from overseas. My cousin was getting married, which a lot of family planned to attend. The better half and I attended a Detroit Lions game (#OnePride). This was the basic premise of the trip.

As usual, my stress level spiked leading up to the trip. I don’t stress about traveling much. I stress about work and making sure things go smooth while I’m gone. I struggle to ‘shut it off’ when I take time off. I admit, I rarely, truly take time off. I still monitor and engage, which is something I need to change. But that is not the purpose of this post tonight. This trip was a reminder of the little things that mean so much more.

My family, on both my mother’s and father’s side, is group of wonderful people. Everyone is unique in their own way and they leave an impression on you every time you’re around them. This trip was family from my mother’s side. They’re a crazy fun bunch. We’re like most families. Nobody is perfect (though I’m damn close). We have our share of drama and craziness.

There is one thing that, at least to me, sets them apart. Whether they realize it or not, they have a knack of building you up and opening your eyes (actually keeping your eyes open), to what’s important. Like I said, we have our share of family drama. We have our crazy aunts and uncles. Siblings that are deadly with silverware. Cousins that don’t seem to have a care in the world.

We were all excited to see each other. We looked forward to welcoming a new member to the freak show with big wedding night. Over a period of about 48 hours, we managed to share our frustrations, stresses, sadness and accomplishments with each other. We’ve had our fair share of sadness and struggles over the past couple of years. The noticeable part to me was how good I felt just being around them…all of them. They constantly build you up. They support. They tell you, you can. They tell you, you will. They offer help. They offer support. They offer to beat someone’s ass if you need it. They give you a hug with that extra little squeeze that takes just a little more stress away. They listen intently to your stories, struggles and jokes. They give you a smile that is genuine. They make you laugh and laugh with you, which everyone needs more of.

Now, over the years, I’ve been beaten and ‘seduced’ by the dark side…the negativity. I had the opposite power that instead of building me up, really broke me down. It took me a long time to realize what the dark side really did to me and it took even longer to build myself back up. The dark side made me think that I wasn’t worthy: I couldn’t: I wouldn’t. I was controlled. I’ll never drift that far to the dark side again. It’s a lonely place. It’s a desperate place. It’s a dark place. Negativity can turn you in a heartbeat. It can weigh on you and bury you in a hole. I’m proof of that.

I have my rock at home(Jo), but was reminded of so many more. I was reminded that I have a foundation. I have the force that is there when needed. I have siblings, parents, a wife, aunts, uncles and crazy-ass cousins that will be there, even if I only get to see many them every couple of years. A short visit helped me mentally, more that they may know. I hope that I have the same influence on them.

Be the good. Stay away from the dark side. Realize and remember that when a sibling tells you just do it…you can. When a cousin says go for it…go. When a parent looks you in the eye and says they do have great kids and are proud of them…its ok to cry happy tears. When your wife takes you by the hand at your most vulnerable moments and says I love you…love them back.

May the force be with you.